Weight and Walking

steps from last week

For the last 4ish years, my weight has been climbing.

Albeit slowly, but steadily.

I know you're going to laugh. I've gained 8 pounds in 4 years.

Given that I'm on a SERM (selective estrogen receptor modulator - a fancy way of saying a pill that blocks my body from absorbing estrogen), only 8 pounds is something to celebrate. SERMs often cause women to gain weight, more than they would off of it and they make it harder to lose weight - even with exercise and diet.

So, only 8 pounds gained makes me quite lucky.

That said, I have a weight I'm not supposed to go over. The magic number is 130.

Apparently breast cancer recurrence is higher if your weight is higher. And so, my magic number is 130.

At my last check-up, I was 133.

I know. Big flipping deal, right?

Three little pounds.

I'm not worried about these three pounds. Honestly, I don't think three pounds will make or break me in the long term. I don't think there is cancer in my body that is floating around going "OH! OH! OH! She's over 130, time to grow and spread gang!" I don't think it works like that.

And yet, I feel like getting down to 130 shouldn't be terribly difficult.  
And yet, knocking off even three pounds isn't going to be easy.

I'm on medicine that wants my body to retain the weight.

[Here's where I take a moment to tell you that a few years ago some meme went around that said something like "I wish I could breast cancer because then I'd lose weight and get a free boob job." Hate to break it to you, breast cancer patients are much more likely to gain weight because of the meds we are put on. So not only is that completely offensive, it's not even how it works.]

steps from this week

Regardless, I've been kicking my butt into high gear lately. Well, I should say kicking into high gear for me.

I've started to walk. A lot.

I used to walk all the time, logging lots of steps each day. I managed to train three times for the Avon 2 Day Walk - and that's not a small commitment either.

So I decided to start walking more. Moving more.

It's not always easy. Often times I pace around the house because of various reasons that I can't leave my house. I've started running up and down the stairs at my house to use different muscles and get my heart rate up. I jog in place. I've been walking on the indoor track that my park district has at least once a week.

I sneak in extra steps where I can. Need to take two things up to the second floor? Then I take them up one at a time.  Earlier this week, I arrived at a meeting early. So I walked around the block twice.

I work hard each day to try to get a lot of steps in. Which is hard because if I'm walking I can't be reading (unless it's an audio book), I can't be working on my needlepoint, or crocheting. I can do simple knitting, but only if I'm at home - not at the track or out of the house.

Despite wanting to just sit, I keep going.

This is where I'm at. This is what I can do.

I can't run, I can't weight train, I can't train for a marathon. But I can walk.

So I walk.
And I walk.
And I walk.
And I walk some more.

It makes me both have more energy and also very tired. I think overall, when I'm awake, I'm more awake. But I am still hitting that energy wall hard and have noticed I've had an uptick in naps. I'm hoping if I just keep it up, that might get better. Or maybe it won't. It will be the price I pay to walk.

But today, today, that price feels worth it.

So I'm going to keep walking. I'm going to keep doing sets of stair climbs. I'm going to walk on the track, or at the mall. If it ever gets warm out, I'll walk outside. I'll continue to pace in the living room, to jog in place by the kitchen table, to walk in circles in the basement.

I'm going to do it for me.

And maybe those three pounds will come off.
And maybe they won't.

But at least I'll be moving.

Random Thoughts

July is almost over. Where did it go?

We've been busy. We're always busy. Do does that mean we're not busy and we're just normal?

Miss 11 modeling the shirt she made

It's County Fair Week. Once again my 4-H'er had lots of projects to turn in. Which meant lots of projects to finish. Which meant me trying to help, without helping, because they are after all, her projects and not mine. We found a good balance this year with it though, so that was good! She worked really hard and I'm proud of her. She got some pretty good ribbons too - not that that is the point, but it sure is a nice thing!

My cancer is not back. I know, I know, weird statement to make. Except in June I wasn't feeling very well at all. I went to the primary care who tested for a heck of a lot of things, only to say she couldn't find anything and I needed to go to the oncologist as she was worried there might be cancer in my bones. So, yeah, that was a few weeks of awful sleep and lots of worry. And oh, not really talking about it because it was probably nothing so no need to worry anyone so don't tell anyone. Which was smart, because it is nothing. So there is no need to worry.

Except, I'm still exhausted all the time. Thanks to some good pain killers though, I am no longer in excruciating pain which is good. I must have hurt my rib cage somehow (and no, I don't know how and there were no bumps or bruises or red spots), but it hurt. A lot. But it's much better now.

Which you can tell if you look at my fitbit stats ... my steps were pretty low for a bit. But now they are more "normal" and I'm breaking 10,000 steps more and more often. I like walking so it's good that I can do it now without wanting to cry. Plus, let's be honest, I like to be in the top 5 on my friends list - though some of my friends are making this hard to do, as 4 of them average about 20,000 steps a day. I'm not ready to compete with that yet, but I'll get as close as I can!

Me, on a bike ;-)

I've also started taking small bike rides. We live so close to so many things, and while I like to walk there, the kids enjoy riding bikes a lot more. I haven't gone over a few miles yet (don't laugh at me please!) but even still, my thighs feel like jelly when we are done. I have a goal to bike 20 miles between now and the end of August. Which is sad, small goal compared to some people, but it's perfect for me. So I'll take it and try to get there. Plus, before we know it, winter will be here and I won't want to be outside at all, so getting some biking in now is a good move.

Speaking of activity, I just got released from occupational therapy. Which I've been doing since the end of May for my lymphedema arm. I had some cording issues come back and everything was just tight, tight, tight. But we broke up the cording, loosened things up, and all is well. So no more going. Which is great because it's quite a time investment to do it. Though, I love my therapist. I would happily go sit at starbucks for hours and chat with her. But I'm glad I don't need to see her for therapy. Of course, I was released from therapy last August and ended back up there again this year. So we'll see how long before I do have to go back. Hopefully not too soon!

Other than that, August means back to school, with a child entering school. For real. Not homeschooled anymore. Gulp. I'm going to miss her when she's away, but I know this is going to be awesome for her! August means camp for the two younger ones. Sleep-away camp. For a week. This is their second year going though, so everyone is a lot less nervous than last year! It also means the start of a small vacation for Miss 11, who will be getting to go visit the grandparents by herself for a week! The oldest did it around this same age, so I guess now we can call it an official tradition!

There are about a million more things to tell you, a million more things racing around in my mind, but for today, I think this is enough!

Hope everyone is having a great Friday and it's followed by a fabulous weekend!

Go Retro Part Two

A bit ago I told you about Retro Fitness and about how I had been going, and loving it!

I didn't tell you about all of it though. So much goodness there, I had to hold a few surprises back.

One thing I LOVE at Retro Fitness is the Cardio movie theater room. Yes. Cardio. Movie. Theater. It is exactly as it sounds: a room full of cardio equipment and a large screen with a moving projecting. Every day they pick another full length feature film and it plays in the room on repeat. You can go in there, run (or, if you're like me, walk) on the treadmill and watch a movie. Or use an elliptical. Whatever your pleasure.

This absolutely helps the time pass and is just so cool! I could easily get lost in the movie and just keep walking.

The treadmills have a coach feature!

Another thing I loved was the equipment had built-in trainers in them. Now, the only gyms I've been in, aren't exactly brand new, so maybe this is standard today but it's not something I've used before. I've been on machines that have built-in programs, but the treadmills here have a built-in trainer, which is called the "Coach". I used the coach several times. You tell the machine what your goal is and how long you want to exercise for. A lovely lady comes up in video and walks you through a program. I did it three times and each time said I wanted the same type of work-out. This training program is neat because it has different combinations and so none of the three work-outs was exactly the same.

I wanted to walk and build endurance (That Avon Walk will be here before I know it!) and was very pleased with it. It starts with some stretching and progresses into the work-out. At the end, the trainer walks you through some more stretching exercises again. It was fabulous! 

I loved my time at Retro Fitness. Of course, now it's March and my time there is over. I'm sad about this.

Overall though, I can tell you, this is what I love about Retro Fitness:

• The space is bright and open
• That staff is helpful and up-beat
• The smoothies are delicious
• The personal trainer blew my socks off and was fabulous
• The machines are new and have great built-in trainers/programs
• I can watch tv easily while working out
• I can watch a movie in the theater room while working out
• Two-thirds of my children are old enough to work-out with me there (not so at the gym my husband goes to)
• Great location right off of Route 64, which is a main road in the area

Miss 11 and I working hard!

Now, with all of that said, I will also tell you, I won't be extending my membership. I will also tell you that I want to. However, we are moving. Yep, moving. I've been hinting since fall we were in the process of making some big decisions. Well, they are made, and we won't be living by Retro Fitness anymore. More on the move later, but to join Retro Fitness (like so many other gyms) you must make a year commitment. And since I know I won't be here in a year, I can not make that commitment. Were we not moving though, I'd be getting a full membership hands down.

I can say I loved my month at Retro Fitness, and if you are in the area, I hope you'll pop in, look around and try it out yourself. You won't regret it!  


 

*As a reminder, I was given my one-month membership in exchange for writing a blog post about my time there. I'm giving it a second post just because I loved it there that much!

Retro Fitness

So, not that long ago someone asked if I would be interested in trying out a gym and blogging about it! Of course I said yes, yes I am!! (note: yes, this is a sponsored post, but as always all opinions are my own!).

So, the last week of January, I headed over to the new Retro Fitness in Carol Stream to check-out their open house.

Treadmills!

Immediately I was struck by how bright and fun it looked. Red and yellow everywhere. Beyond looks though, my second thought was how friendly everyone was. The staff was great. And oh, did I mention we got to try some of the smoothies? Because, yum!

Rocking the compression sleeve!

I met one of the personal trainers and was instantly put at ease by him. I've talked before about my lymphedema, and it's something I worry about. Certain exercises I just can't do or I will make it worse {but in general, exercising is good for it}. T, the trainer I spoke too, impressed me first by knowing what lymphedema was. As we spoke further, he told me he was trained to work with people who had issues and felt confident he could help me.

I left so excited about being able to come back for a month and use the gym! Which is a great thing, because a) I am not athletic and b) these days exercising scares me because of my arm and the anemia that is still a problem and c) I'm not exactly a gym rat by any stretch of the imagination!

working out is so much more fun with tv lol!

So, the open house was all well and good. I left excited, but let's be honest. I wanted to really try the gym, to go work-out and experience it!

So last week, 3 times I went over and worked out! The first two days I stuck with the cardio machines - treadmill, elliptical, bicycle, and stair climber. {side note: the stair climber is by far the hardest thing for me. I thought I would die lol!} Friday I met with the personal trainer and had a training session. It. Was. Awesome.

I loved the machines. I love that I could plug my phone into them to stream music or netflix. I love that I got to watch tv on the machine - not just a few tvs spread out around the gym.  And the trainer? He delivered! He didn't just talk the talk, but he walked the walk. He worked me out perfectly - in a way that I felt pushed, but not too pushed. He didn't do anything to my arm that made me wonder should I be doing this? Everything was perfect. I even did more sit-ups than I ever thought possible with him. Of course, when he told me to do sit-ups I mentioned that I couldn't even do 1. Turns out I can! ;-)

Smoothie bar

After two of the work-outs, I decided to get a smoothie. Mostly because they are delicious, but also because I felt like I needed to reward myself for going and the smoothies aren't only just a nice way to do that, but they are healthy. Traditionally I might have rewarded myself with some extra chocolate, so, smoothies are definitely a great option!

My son in the child care room

The staff continues to be wonderful and amazing! A few times I've had to ask "hey, how do you use this?" and they answer without making me feel like a complete idiot for not knowing! I love it!

I haven't been back this week because a) we were out of town and b) my car broke down. But I will definitely be going back and using the gym for the rest of this month.

There are some cool areas I still haven't used (like the theater room) that I want to try out and definitely come back and share with all of you!

That said, if you are local, you should absolutely stop by and check Retro Fitness out and give them a try. I don't think you will regret it!

Scarves

I've been a knitting fool and have made a lot of scarves lately. The thing is, I can walk and knit. And sometimes job in place and knit. And occasionally, I can jog in place, read a book, and knit. I know, I know, it's crazy. I'm usually pretty klutzy and so it amazes even me that I haven't killed myself yet. However, it seems I become less klutzy when I have a pair of knitting needles in my hand.

Anyway, I guess this is pretty fascinating because sometimes I mention it and then people look at me like I have two heads. I suppose, it's not often I see people walking down the street knitting away (though I did see it once, and no, I wasn't looking in a mirror). So, alas, in an effort to be healthy, train for the avon walk, I walk and knit.

Scarves are the easiest for sure. I once started a shawl and knit, but once it got to a certain width, it became impossible to do so. So I stick to scarves. I had about 8 done when I offered to sell one to someone, in exchange for a donation of their choosing to my Avon walk. I really expected people to be say oh, that's cute. I don't need one. Good luck. But a few people actually wanted the scarves I made. Kind of cool, and flattering (I won't lie!)

So today I mailed 3 scarves off to their new homes. I had 2 others (that were gorgeous if I do say so myself) but I forgot to photograph them before giving them to their new owners. Anyway, here are my walking scarves! The pictures are great. I took them with my phone last night while trying to get everything ready to ship =)


This scarf is going to the first person who responded. She mentioned she just got cream gloves and asked which scarf would match. I didn't actually have a cream one knit up, but I knew I had cream yarn, so I offered to make her one just for her!


Then there is this purple beauty, which I love. I may have to make myself a second one. This one was snatched up pretty quickly as well.


And last but not least, this gray beauty. Looks familiar huh? Someone saw the purple one and said, oh, can I have that in gray? And I said yes! I love this pattern so much. I could knit it a million more times and not grow tired of it. The yarn is thick enough that it keeps your warm, but the holes make it so it isn't too warm (as someone who is prone to hot flashes, that is pretty important to me!)

Anyway, some of my recent knitting to show you =) I suppose next week I'll have to talk more about all my walking, and somewhere I have a video of my walking and knitting that I might have to post!

Have a good Friday night!

More on getting stronger

*This is a sponsored post, but as always, all thoughts and opinions are mine!

I mentioned before that I was taking some classes at The Dailey Method.
I've already talked about how it makes me feel stronger, which is something I'm craving for sure.

But the cool thing is that I walk out of class feeling taller. I get the same feeling when I do pilates. It's a nice feeling. I catch myself slumping during the day and pop back up.

But there is also a big emotional component to it for me. There is something that feels so good about being in these classes and being able to do them. Even when my legs are shaking so much I feel like I'm going to fall down (which I have to add, I believe it was Melisa who told me that's just my muscles saying hi. Apparently, I haven't chatted with them enough before LOL!)

I can't lie, cancer has left me feeling beaten and weak and like my body is broken (more on that coming soon - it's been on my mind a lot lately). I was just talking to another woman who went through breast cancer who is feeling the same way. We are often held up as "strong" and "heroes" and often people around (with the best of intentions) shower us with these compliments. But the truth is these compliments feel wrong to us because often we don't feel an ounce stronger. Some of us feel broken. We feel like our body has betrayed us. We feel like we are undeserving of compliments that so many want to shower us with.

And most of this is a broken spirit. Emotions that are left so raw.

Going to these classes is not only getting my body stronger, but it's helping on the emotional side of things too. There is something powerful about getting to the end, even when your muscles are shouting HI to you ;-)



Disclosure: I was given a one month membership to the studio in exchange for telling you about my experience. As always though, all opinions and thoughts are my own

What doesn't kill you ...

Makes you stronger, right? I mean we've all heard the saying and more recently I'm sure most of us has sung along to the song!

I'm not sure if cancer has left me mentally stronger. I suppose in some ways it has. That said, physically, I am weaker than ever. Really. I did not get through surgeries, chemo, radiation, infection, medicine issues very well. At some points I could barely walk ... working out? Not even anywhere on the list of things to worry about. But lately, I've been ready to tackle it. And to get stronger, especially with my right arm, which has suffered the most during all of this. Not only that, but exercising is one of the few items I can control to help prevent recurrence. So I've been thinking about it. 

And lo and behold, just as this was on my mind I was offered a month to try out The Dailey Method. If you are like me, you have no idea what TDM is. Well, "The Dailey Method® is a unique combination of ballet barre work, core conditioning, muscle strengthening, yoga, and orthopedic exercises." In other words: TDM is Awe. Some. 

I've had the chance to take 3 classes now. And I Love it. Yes, Love with a capital L. 

Here's the thing: I am still technically recovering from my last surgery so I was a bit nervous about trying this out. I suck at following along in classes - historically, I get lost, confused and can't keep up, so I was nervous to try out these classes. And I feel so weak from everything that I was nervous to try out these classes. To sum up, I was nervous! LOL! 

But it went so well. Every class I've been too so far, the instructor comes around before class and introduces herself and asks if there are any injuries/issues she needs to be aware of. This is awesome. I explain (a streamlined version) of all that's going on and right from the beginning, they tell me: don't use weights when we go into that portion. Don't do this position when we get there, do this one. This has been invaluable to me. Truly. It's nice to start the class knowing ... I don't have to be nervous we'll get to something and I have to debate in my head can I do this or should I not. 

Not only that, but during the entire class the instructors walk around and reposition you if you need it (I need this often). If I get confused, the instructor comes over right away and helps me figure out what is going on. This is priceless. I don't have a big history of working out and so sometimes directions that seem simple enough to those who are used to them make no sense in my head. I think, wait, tilt what? What does that even mean? LOL!  

And during class the instructors are awesome at giving modifications for those who need it - whether it's one you need because you are new and still learning or because you are a seasoned pro and ready to take it up a notch. And they are very keen on reminding all of us in class to LISTEN to our bodies. They are great at reminding you to do what you need for YOU, not to worry about what others are doing. 

Overall, I love it. I'm so impressed.



I highly recommend trying it at least once - which is perfect since you can try a class for free! There are 8 locations in the Chicago area, but they are also all over the US. If you get the chance, definitely try it!


Disclosure: I was given a one month membership to the studio in exchange for telling you about my experience. As always though, all opinions and thoughts are my own

A new journey ...

It seems lately I'm on a new journey around here, that is seriously messing with my crafting time.

I have been actively exercising (something I almost never ever do), eating healthy, and getting out of the house to take walks and explore nature with the kids.

I am a person who was averaging at least 4 cans of pop a day (yes, that means that some days I drank more!) It's so sad, but I needed all that caffeine to keep me going. Anyway, over the last 4 days I have only had 2. Might not seem like much, but even my husband is impressed with me.

And I've been sleeping more - not up so late at night.

I have to tell you. I feel great. I am loving this. I can't wait to do my exercise each day. Which, I am doing the EA Sports Active 30 day challenge. I wish I could say it was sponsored (then I wouldn't have had to buy it LOL) but alas, this is not. This is just me saying that I finally found something that has me so excited to work-out each day! And I've been so motivated by wanting to exercise, that I've been eating better and trying to be healthier in general.

This is nothing short of amazing. A week ago I couldn't even do 10 squats without wanting to cry, now I can do 16 jumping squats!

Today is only day 5 - but the worst soreness has already worn off. I can walk up the stairs without wanting to cry ;-) It's an amazing feeling. I've never pushed through that pain of starting a new work out program.

Anyway, I'm learning how to juggle all of this into my list of things I need to do each day and so there's a learning curve to figure out what things stay in each day and what needs to go and what needs to be added.

But, I think I'm on a good journey, one I needed to do for a while just to get myself healthier. Of course, my favorite pair of jeans deciding to not fit anymore is what finally got me up off my butt, but I'm glad I finally did! =)

More Wii Fit

Because I am obsessed with it ... but I will have to admit that my muscles ache. My legs, especially are sore, but it's all so worth it.

So Tina requested some pictures of a Wii Fit work-out and I laughed, thinking, no way was I gonna let the whole world see me exercising! But then I decided that maybe I would share with you ... so, here I am, doing some skiing:

Yes, there are toys everywhere. Please, I beg you to ignore them because well, I have decided toys everywhere are just a part of the stage of life I am in and so it no longer bothers me anymore!

The strength training is the hardest for me by far (and anyone who knows me in real life will not be shocked by this). I was doing the push-ups/t-position exercise and I stopped. The game said to me (not kidding) "Hey! Your muscles won't train themselves" I can't type here what I responded to the game, but it was along the lines of whatever you nasty witch. You freaking lips don't even move so what do you know anyway? At which point I heard my husband crack up laughing at the fact that I was yelling back at a GAME! LOL!

But, I also want you to know, I am not the only person obsessed with Wii Fit in my house - so here is my 8 year old doing the tightrope game (which I might add, she totally gets WAY higher scores than I do on this game!)


But it's fun and it's worth it and I love how the game encourages us to get up and move!

Speaking of Wii Fit, don't forget about the giveaway going on over at Been There!

Wii Fit Giveaway!

Holy Moly Cow! The lovely women of The Motherhood are givng away a Wii Fit and a Wii Console! Seriously, how amazingly awesome is that!
So if you want to win one, go here and read the directions!

As an owner of the Wii Fit, I have to say, that this is a fabulous opportunity and please, please, please go enter!

And oh, if you think about, help spread the word to others as well!

Wii Fit: Day 1

Well, I've been playing with it and testing it out ... I have apparently played 35 minutes today - at which point the game actually told me it would be a good idea to take a break - and they recommend 15-20 minutes for every hour played.
I am enjoying it. I have only the first 5 yoga poses available, but 2 are new to me (since I just started to do yoga not that long ago I have been sticking to very basic poses). The strength training is my downfall. Balance is the most fun and aerobic is fun too.
But I have one complaint ... when you are doing yoga or strength training - you have to do one exercise, go to the menu, pick the next one, do the next one, go back to the menu, etc, etc ... so just about when you feel like you are working, you get a break. I wish there was a way for you to string together the ones you want to do.
Also, I did the aerobic exercise (only 2 of them) and they don't last that much longer either. I can only hope that the exercises get longer as you unlock more of them.
Of course it says it was designed to be your only source of exercise and there is a way for you to go in and add the other minutes of exercise you have done outside of the Wii, so maybe that is why - this is just a method to learn the techniques, really work on balance and posture while doing them, and then take off with something that is harder? Who knows, I read that many think Nintendo is working on upgrades for the game already and :::Crossing fingers::: I hope that is one of the things they can add.

That said, I am having fun! I think the balance games are by far the most fun - the ski jump, well, I am rocking the ski jump actually LOL! I do not regret buying it at all and the kids want to play all the balance games too - so I think this could actually be a game that the whole family uses (when I really bought it thinking I would be the only one!)

Crazy lady

So it's 7:45 in the morning and we are outside our local target. No, they are not even open yet - I am just that crazy!
Really I just want the Wii fit!

(the children in front of target at 7:40 am and surprisingly no one else was there!)

UPDATE: I got the Wii Fit. I actually got 4 - but don't worry. They won't end up on e-bay for hundreds of dollars. I had to buy it for my mom and 2 of my aunts. The stores by them sold out in moments. Ours still had about 30 left when I left a 9 am. Apparently, not many people must shop there. Which, is nice for me!