Softball ...

Well, we were supposed to have a busy softball week this week, but rain kept us from most of our games.
However, Miss M did have her first game of the season Tuesday! And it was so great!



My little girl has so very much grown up over the course of the last year! There is such a difference between last year and this year.




It's one of my favorite parts of being a mom - watching the kids grow and learn. I don't ever need my kids to be the best of the best - really we are playing sports to have fun and learn to be part of the team and to pass the time! But I can't lie - seeing practice pay off and hard work show - that's just awesome. {Both girls participated in softball classes over the winter!}



And my Little M (okay, so she's not really little, she's really tall, but she's little to me!} is having a GREAT season too. Daddy is her coach this year and so that is definitely a plus. And the team gets along so well and they all have fun together!



I know this is going to be a great season for her. As long as the rain stops interfering with the games that is! =)

The elephant in the room ...

Or maybe it's just the elephant in my mind, either way, I need to get this out.

Sometimes you might ask me a question and I seem hesitant to answer or like I just don't want to tell you. The thing is, it's not you - I promise. But, well, here - lean in a bit - it's just that this cancer is well, um, ::lowers voice to a whisper:: it's in my breast!

I know, I know. You're thinking something along the lines of "Duh. That's why it's called breast cancer you genius."

You may be also thinking something like we are not 10 year old children learning about puberty for the first time too. And yet, some days, I kind of feel that way. Because, lately, I've been talking a lot about my breasts - or as my 8 year old like to say (over and over by the way) my boobs. And sometimes it can feel a bit awkward for me.

I'm sure it's all in my head but I can't help but thinking there are a lot of people thinking about my boobs out there. Okay, you are all probably really thinking about me and how I'm doing. But in my head you are thinking about my boobs. And I can't help but wish I had gotten, oh, I don't know - thumb cancer. Or big toe cancer. Because it just feels less awkward that way.

But alas, here we are. I have breast cancer. And so my breasts we might talk about occasionally. But sometimes, when I turn into that 10 year old who is still giggling in embarrassment over learning the correct names of body parts I might hold back or seem hesitant or whatever. But don't worry - it's not you. It's me. I suppose at the heart of it, it's still me coming to terms with what is happening within my own body - and more specifically what is going on inside my breasts.

Update ...

All the test results came in, and so I e-mailed out an update last night. I'm sure I've (accidentally) missed some people so I decided to just copy the e-mail over here for anyone checking!

Dear Friends and Family,

First of all, let me begin by thanking each and every one of you from the bottom of my heart - the e-mails, tweets, cards, phone calls - have all just been so wonderful and mean so much to me. I wish I could call each one of you personally to thank you, but for now, I hope this will do.  So thank you very much.

This week we got all the test results in that we were waiting for. The big take away for me in all of this is that the tests showed I am so lucky that we found it when we did. Based on the second biopsy and MRI results, we are pretty confident that the cancer has already spread to the lymph nodes on the right side. This can't be absolutely confirmed until surgery, but it would be surprising at this point for the surgery to show other results. The biggest surprise from the MRI is that the left side, which we previously thought was clear, actually has precancer forming.

The good news is this is all very manageable. And we now have a treatment plan in place. Surgery will be taking place in the next few weeks. We are still waiting for a concrete date - we have to coordinate the OR, my surgeon, and the plastic surgeon. (Thankfully, the offices are talking to each other because I can't even imagine how I would try to organize all of that!!) During the surgery I will be getting a bilateral mastectomy. A few weeks afters surgery I will begin chemotherapy treatments. And then radiation to follow. During this time I will also begin taking both herceptin and tamoxifen. I will be on the herceptin for a year and tamoxifen for five years. Basically because of what they know about my cancer, I am able to utilize every treatment available for breast cancer. While that feels overwhelming, again it makes me very lucky and helps decrease chance of recurrence.

Anyway, for now the doctor's appointments are done and we won't know anything else until after surgery. As an aside, I don't want to bombard everyone with lots of e-mails so I am trying to regularly update my blog, which you can feel free to read at any time over at http://journeyof1000stitches.blogspot.com/ . I will point out trying to update are the key words there! =)

Thank you very much for the prayers and good thoughts. It really does mean so very much to me!

Love,
Me =)

Waiting!

They say that waiting for test results is hard to do-ooo.
Now I know, I know that it's true-oo ....

So, I guess it's a good thing I know how to pass the time between that waiting. I've managed to do a bit of knitting. I know it doesn't look like much yet, but they will look prettier soon!



Speaking of knitting, look at the gorgeous yarn I received in the mail




I have some ideas of what it might eventually become but I'm not sure yet! It's so gorgeous and soft and lovely though. I can't wait to start knitting with it. A few weeks ago I also got some pretty sock yarn in the mail (all of this yarn has been gifts from lots of loving friends!). So I have to knit up some pretty socks to wear too! And well, knitting isn't such a bad way to pass the time.

Aside from that, the kids schedules are keeping me busy! There's school work to do, games to play, art to make, music and sports to drive too! {And yes, I know some of you have been wondering, but we do plan to continue homeschooling at this time. It's part of trying to keep the kids lives as consistent as possible and not completely turning their world upside down. Might it become challenging at some points? Sure. But that's the beauty of homeschooling - we can move at the pace we need to move at for us.}

And of course, the internet keeps me busy - so many wonderful e-mails for me to read each day and I'm trying to respond to them as I can! And well, I probably shouldn't admit this, but um, I've recently fallen in love with all the Real Housewives shows. I know, I know! But they are fun to watch and just tune out my reality for a while!

So we are waiting. But at least it's not pacing and praying for the phone to ring right. this. very. minute. And hopefully, the wait will soon be over! But in the meantime, I'll keep knitting, being mom, being wife, being daughter, and watching reality tv ;-)

In other news ....

Although I can accurately report that the topic of cancer has seemed to take over our home, only one thing has been talked about more: t-ball and softball!

Yep, it's ball season in our house and this year we are extra busy as both girls are playing softball and Mister Man is finally old enough to join t-ball. Now, this boy has grown up watching his sisters play. He was probably 4 months old when he attended his first practice/game. And he has been wanting to play himself for quite some time.

So, finally, last week, Mister Man had his first game!


If you can't tell he was beyond excited and couldn't wait to play!



Hitting is one of his favorite things to do, although he also likes to play at the pitchers spot!




I love watching the little kids play t-ball. All in the ready position. How they all like to run towards the ball almost regardless of where on the field it lands. It's so fun!



This picture, however, this is my favorite. Mister Man was playing first base. He clearly missed learning about how to play first base. While he was never ready to catch the ball, here he is telling the child on first base when it's time for him to run to second base! It was so cute and so funny!



We have a great team this year - all the parents are laid back and just really want the kids to have fun and learn the game. We aren't really keeping track of score. It's a great first year of team t-ball for him.

The girls right now are still practicing and preparing for those first games! Miss Em is extra happy this year because daddy is her coach. I can't wait for their first games - which I believe are next week! =)