So, um, hello.
How is everyone?
It's been a while since I've been around.
The end of September and October have been crazy months. Lots of ups and downs. And busy. I can't even tell you how many doctor office's I've been in - between myself, the kids and granny.
The husband is working two jobs - his normal and one seasonal (at a pumpkin farm! In the haunted house! He is literally a monster this month!)
And me? Well, I've just been trying to get through it all.
October is kind of a weird month for me. Because there is pink everywhere. And well meaning people want to talk about breast cancer. And friends want to share links with me of October campaigns done right, and some done horribly wrong. This month? I just want to avoid it all. I want October to be the month of Halloween and fall and baking apples and seeing the leaves change colors! Not the month of boobs and cancer and pink and all the crap about how I'm such a survivor because I fought hard and ra-ra-ra-sis-boom-ba-breast-cancer-is-awesome! (No, no one actually believes that, but sometimes, I'm not going to lie, I really wonder if maybe some people actually do think that).
It's been a month of ups and downs. One kid had to go to a specialist. I thought I would die taking him as it was a hematologist/oncologist and, well, I had a lot of baggage to carry into that appointment. But the doctor feels that everything is okay and that we should just go home, relax, and carry on with life as normal.
Which is funny because I still have no clue what normal is. Things change a lot around here.
I have one child in school. As in she gets up every day, gets on a bus, goes to school, comes home and does homework. I always knew she'd go to school for high school, but it's here now, and I miss her. Okay, most days I miss her being home all day. It's different and it's new and she is adjusting so well, but there were some bumps along the way. It's to be expected. School is different than what we did here. But it's also good.
I went in to see a hematologist, who while was a very kind doctor, couldn't offer really any more information than my oncologist in regards to my low iron. So I decided to bite the bullet and start working with an allergist to desensitize me to iron. Except I called a couple and they said they couldn't do that. So. I'm back to where I was before and kind of feeling really annoyed with it all.
And then there is everything involved with helping granny. I haven't talked about it much here - it's awkward because I never know what to say really because I don't want to share her stories here. But the gist is, when we sold our house, it was to move in with her and help her out. There is more to helping her than I was expecting. And she has her own fair share of doctors appointments. So I'm trying to juggle everyone's schedules. A few weeks ago she fell twice in a week and broke at least one rib (though I really think two, except we never x-rayed the other side because lungs sounded okay and there isn't much they can do for that anyway). She's healing, but she wasn't feeling well for a while. And I slept on the couch to be close in case she needed something. All things out of our control. And granny is one of the sweetest people ever and constantly thanking me (even though it's not necessary), so it's not hard to help her. But it is sometimes because it's another thing to juggle. (But mostly it's not).
Basically, October has been a month where I've pretty much managed to do only what needed to be done.
Plus some knitting. Because it is cheaper than therapy. I've been taking pictures of things, but now I have to just actually post them! Soon ... at least, I won't let another almost month go by before I share them!
It sounds like your life is busy busy busy. I hope you are finding time to look after yourself too. As for pink October - we don't really have that going on in the UK but I've seen on a few US blogs that I read that a lot of that stuff can feel a little insensitive or ill-judged for many of the people who actually know what breast cancer really entails. Oh well, enjoy those pumpkins and autumn leaves and dark evenings - just what October is meant to be for.
ReplyDelete