A new journey ...

So a few weeks ago I started a new journey. One I never wanted to be one. One I really never thought I'd have to be on.

At first it didn't appear the journey would be long or serious. And as we got farther into it, we started to realize that might not be the case. And today I learned I will continue on this path that truly? I want off. Now.

All of this is a fancy  strange  beating around the bush my way to tell you that earlier today I learned that I have breast cancer. It's kind of scary to write it. To see it in print. To share it with all of you. I can't lie. Every time I share it it feels both like the cancer gains more power, and at the same time I feel like no, I'm the stronger one. Does that make any sense? I'm not sure it makes sense to me.

I've known most of the day. I still feel shocked by it. Maybe I'll always feel shocked by it? I'm not sure. I do know my thoughts have been all over the place today and some don't make any sense and some are really scary but most are just millions of questions I now have.

At this point I don't know more than that. I will learn a lot more tomorrow. I'm not sure I'll be ready to share all of it with you tomorrow. And yet, I feel like sharing will help me through all of this.

So there it is. I don't know how to end this post eloquently. What else can I say at this point?